Dear everyone, my name is Anna and I am writing to you all the way from Austin, Texas, where I am currently on my year abroad. The experience so far has been unexpected in many ways and considering I came here feeling over-prepared and ready to take on the world I thought I might share some of those unexpected outcomes with anybody who is thinking about or preparing to go on a year abroad or even just travel somewhere they’ve never been.

Backstory: Before I came here I considered myself a seasoned adventurer. I have been travelling alone since I was 16 and have visited many countries in Europe. I thought that because I had managed to conquer so many difficult situations in various cultures, sometimes in places where I didn’t even speak the language and additionally consumed copious amounts of American college-based movies, I was all good to go. I had done all the necessary research; what to do for fun, must eats, expected temperatures, traditions, famous people born or living in Austin, etc. I was excited and everyone around me was excited for me. For the last 3 months of living in Edinburgh, all I heard was what an incredible time I was going to have and how everyone was so jealous. I left with the same feeling you get as a kid on Christmas Eve or before a school trip to the Zoo.

Arrival: I landed in Austin at 8 pm after 26 hours of travelling. I got in a taxi and headed to my Airbnb that I had booked 4 weeks prior. This is where sh*t hits the fan. I was promptly dropped off in a neighborhood where there wasn’t a single working street light and there were potholes the size of small swimming pools on the road. The apartment I was renting and sharing with the owner took things from bad to terrible. Every inch of the interior was covered in tinfoil to “block out the internet waves that the government uses to make our hair fall out”, that’s what I was told by the lovely but insane lady I was staying with for a week. Over the course of the next couple of days, I tried my best to maintain a 100% optimistic attitude but inside I knew just how thrown off I had been by my arrival. It didn’t exactly get better after either. Austin is a much more dangerous city than any place I’d ever lived before and at the beginning, I really struggled with the large homeless population and the fact that there seemed to be no safe place in the city. Everywhere I went I felt scared and unsafe. This made exploring and settling in extremely difficult and worst of all I felt like I couldn’t tell anyone. I was supposed to be having the time of my life but instead, I felt resentment towards the city and began to regret my choice.

It gets better: My first breakthrough came with my first breakdown. One night my friend sent me a funny video about the cultural differences between the US and the UK. The second I finished watching it I called him and burst into tears. I was sobbing. I told him how scared I felt ALL the time and how it was affecting my ability to truly enjoy my experience. I explained how exhausting it was constantly having to look over my shoulder and never be at ease and that I didn’t know if I could last a full year feeling like this. I expected him to start comforting me, but he didn’t. Instead, he chuckled and said: “How many friends have you made?” I replied “Zero”. “How many classes or social events have you attended? Zero”. “How many days have you been there?” “9”. “You’ll be just fine, give it time”. After that, I felt a shift in my perspective. This was such a big adventure and challenge that everything was going to take longer. I was comparing my adjustment period in Austin to what it would usually take me on a 7-day holiday in Italy. It was not the same but at the time that was so hard to see, because I thought I came prepared, so by default I thought, it couldn’t have been me, it must be the city. But it was both. It took me a lot longer than some of my friends here to find the appreciation for this new place I was living but eventually, I really did get used to all the differences and started to feel more at ease and comfortable.

Conclusion: Whether you have experience or not, are excited or nervous or prepared or not, every new experience is different and you never truly know until you’re there. Give yourself grace when dealing with negative emotions. It doesn’t mean you made a mistake or that you’re ungrateful for the opportunity. Don’t ignore them or suppress them because they can be very helpful in navigating how to approach settling in and what is the driving force behind your fear or discomfort. Sometimes you don’t even have to change anything you just need to wait and time will eventually put all the pieces into place for you. That could mean meeting people, getting involved with societies, the weather changing, finishing furnishing your room or learning the layout of the city. Eventually, your worries will fade and the excitement and joy will kick in, but no matter how long it takes, just remember that everyone gets scared and you are NEVER the odd one out.

Listen to Anna speak more about her experience abroad at University of Texas at Austin here.